Wow! 2008 just around the corner!
2007 has become another memory for me. Thank for 2007, I truly experience a lot!
I have face dramatically changes from student to working adult and also from single get into love relationship and back to single again.
Well, I enjoy my single status and I still don’t know how balance my life with another person. Yes, I think I’m selfish and I don’t want sacrife for everyone’ sake. I can’t cope with lifestyle like that.
I still love Jerry but it does not mean that I will reconcile with him again. I think he also doesn’t want. Sometimes, my heart will still pain whenever think about him but I believe God will heal and cure.
To love Jerry,
Sometimes, I don’t understand why you purposely want to hurt me. In front of me, you called other girl as your wife and have close relationship with another girl. I don’t understand why you do so. I think you want me to give up you completely. When every time you do so, it does drive me crazy and I want explore! But I still maintain my attitude and cry back behind you.
I think my friend is right, I’m so fake in front of you. I think you also. Why we end up like this? Why we keep hurting each other?
I truly thank God for delight me! I don’t keep hatred in my heart and I don’t want to blame anyone. God teach me a lesson which is let go and still love.
When the moment I chose forgive and forget, my heart does not pain again for the moment. I found out the greatest love in this world is love of God to me.
I still love you my lao gong, Jerry. But let us not to hurt each other again. I know I lost you forever already. Don’t worry, no matter what happen I won’t go back to you again. I respect your decision.
Everything is happen by choice and not by chance. My choice is still remain let you go and your choice is our relationship should not go on. Alright, let us stick the choice that we already make. Maybe we are not mean to be together.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
lose you
It has been so long I did not online at all. I have face crisis in my love life and I lose him.
I thought it will perfectly well to me but actually are not. Whenever he is closer, my heart is pain and my tears want to drop down.
Thanks for Suki! You are truly my buddy! Thank for your patient to listen my phone call and asked me not to cry. I was crying while I was speaking to her.
On the yesterday night, I was crying badly and sadly until I don’t know how to stop it. So, I decided to call Suki again. After a long talk, I found out that how bad I was to him. I really need to make decision whether to stay or move on.
When I was found out I’m the one who make mistake, I stop crying and thinking about the decision I should make.
Maybe, we will remain as friend or.. I don’t know and I don’t have any idea.
To love Jerry,
Sorry for all thing. I know I’m unreasonable all the time. I know you are so tired dealing with me. Why you refuse to say anything and comment about me?
I always said I’m willing to let you go but I couldn’t did it.
At least, we should cool down first. My trust to you is too little because I’m selfish and I want protect myself from being hurt by others. While you said, I don’t think we should go on. Without hesitate, I agree with you.
Right now, I would not beg you to come back to my life again. Maybe we should where we stay and remain as friend.
When the time with you, I totally lost balance in my career, family, friend and religion life.
Right now, I do like the feeling that I have more focus in my career rather than you. I was motivated to do all the thing to grow my team because I don’t have anyone to depend on. Do or die! Even I go back to you, I can’t overcome that and I think break up still will become our ending.
Learn to be more independent!
I thought it will perfectly well to me but actually are not. Whenever he is closer, my heart is pain and my tears want to drop down.
Thanks for Suki! You are truly my buddy! Thank for your patient to listen my phone call and asked me not to cry. I was crying while I was speaking to her.
On the yesterday night, I was crying badly and sadly until I don’t know how to stop it. So, I decided to call Suki again. After a long talk, I found out that how bad I was to him. I really need to make decision whether to stay or move on.
When I was found out I’m the one who make mistake, I stop crying and thinking about the decision I should make.
Maybe, we will remain as friend or.. I don’t know and I don’t have any idea.
To love Jerry,
Sorry for all thing. I know I’m unreasonable all the time. I know you are so tired dealing with me. Why you refuse to say anything and comment about me?
I always said I’m willing to let you go but I couldn’t did it.
At least, we should cool down first. My trust to you is too little because I’m selfish and I want protect myself from being hurt by others. While you said, I don’t think we should go on. Without hesitate, I agree with you.
Right now, I would not beg you to come back to my life again. Maybe we should where we stay and remain as friend.
When the time with you, I totally lost balance in my career, family, friend and religion life.
Right now, I do like the feeling that I have more focus in my career rather than you. I was motivated to do all the thing to grow my team because I don’t have anyone to depend on. Do or die! Even I go back to you, I can’t overcome that and I think break up still will become our ending.
Learn to be more independent!
Monday, October 15, 2007
幸福
我是一个不善于表达的人，不喜欢对外人说私人的事。所以，很多亲密朋友并不是很了解我。即使不高兴，我宁愿选择一个人偷偷哭泣而不对人诉苦。
因为假日，所以多了和老公相处的时间。坦诚相对，互相说了很多心里话。说着说着，把心中的不满都说了出来，眼泪跟着就流了下来，没想到因此让我们的关系更进一步。
老公说的话蛮感动我的，因为这个机会让他更了解我，发现他很爱很爱我这个什么事都收在心底的傻瓜，偶然发现我们两个有很多相似的地方。
前几天，跌倒到很糟糕，整个人叭在地上。老公特地来照顾我并且很心疼得为我擦药，还蛮感动的。
我想所谓的幸福就是如此，有爱你的人在你身边疼惜着你。
因为假日，所以多了和老公相处的时间。坦诚相对，互相说了很多心里话。说着说着，把心中的不满都说了出来，眼泪跟着就流了下来，没想到因此让我们的关系更进一步。
老公说的话蛮感动我的，因为这个机会让他更了解我，发现他很爱很爱我这个什么事都收在心底的傻瓜，偶然发现我们两个有很多相似的地方。
前几天，跌倒到很糟糕，整个人叭在地上。老公特地来照顾我并且很心疼得为我擦药，还蛮感动的。
我想所谓的幸福就是如此，有爱你的人在你身边疼惜着你。
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
爱你的日子
有时候发现自己会做一些傻事，恋爱中的女人会变笨？也许是吧！担心着他，即使下着大雨也挡不住这颗要见他的心。
但是，因为自己的傻引起更大的麻烦。最后，老公严厉谴责我。当他骂完我后，叫我给他感想，他紧紧握着我的手，仿佛知道我会中途跑掉。我说一会儿，就发现我的眼泪要留下了，甩开了他的手，跑离现场，不愿让他看到我的眼泪决堤。
还好我够理智，即使多么生气他，还是告诉他了。最后，他打了我电话，我们才一起回家。也因为我们争吵，他错过他的最后一班巴士。结果，真的是一起回家，第一次带男人回我的家。
和他谈了很多，他教了我很多事。这还是我毕生以来，迟睡没有乱发脾气，我只睡了大约三小时，但叫老公起床却花了超过一个小时。经理还是很担心，他最怕就是我们两个发生意外，造成无法挽救的遗憾。我还以为经理会叫我去问话，但是他却奇迹般的不过问一切。是不是对我太失望了？还好，我们并没有发生特别的事。
争吵并没有我们的距离拉远，反而把我们扣得更近。老公很担心有一天我会突然从他的生命中消失，他会找不到我。这确实是我想过的，那一天忍不住了，行李一收，回老家让他一辈子也别想再见我。所以，老公总是想要做些什么锁住我，他还真怕我就这样离开他。因为和他一起，压力还真是很大，压得透不过气的那天，我就这样走了，永远都找不回了。
但是，因为自己的傻引起更大的麻烦。最后，老公严厉谴责我。当他骂完我后，叫我给他感想，他紧紧握着我的手，仿佛知道我会中途跑掉。我说一会儿，就发现我的眼泪要留下了，甩开了他的手，跑离现场，不愿让他看到我的眼泪决堤。
还好我够理智，即使多么生气他，还是告诉他了。最后，他打了我电话，我们才一起回家。也因为我们争吵，他错过他的最后一班巴士。结果，真的是一起回家，第一次带男人回我的家。
和他谈了很多，他教了我很多事。这还是我毕生以来，迟睡没有乱发脾气，我只睡了大约三小时，但叫老公起床却花了超过一个小时。经理还是很担心，他最怕就是我们两个发生意外，造成无法挽救的遗憾。我还以为经理会叫我去问话，但是他却奇迹般的不过问一切。是不是对我太失望了？还好，我们并没有发生特别的事。
争吵并没有我们的距离拉远，反而把我们扣得更近。老公很担心有一天我会突然从他的生命中消失，他会找不到我。这确实是我想过的，那一天忍不住了，行李一收，回老家让他一辈子也别想再见我。所以，老公总是想要做些什么锁住我，他还真怕我就这样离开他。因为和他一起，压力还真是很大，压得透不过气的那天，我就这样走了，永远都找不回了。
Saturday, October 6, 2007
我的错
昨天，经理特地和我一起工作，真得蛮压力的。结果，被他骂到很惨，因为做错很多事。
其实，他说得很对，我是该成熟一点，有时的我的确很幼稚，很没大没小。如果现在不要进步，就无法像老公一样领着大队。虽然，我真得很不爽被他从头到脚批评到很惨。但是，我的确错了，我应该进步。
老公一看到我的表情，就知道肯定发生了事情。但是，我没有时间和他沟通。经理不准我们一起回家，很想抱着老公。看着老公担心的眼神，一扫阴霾，再一次肯定了我的选择。
也许，就像老公说得那样，我们很早就开始了，只是我们都没有发觉。两颗紧紧相扣的心，无法分开，所以我们才会发展的很快。
其实，他说得很对，我是该成熟一点，有时的我的确很幼稚，很没大没小。如果现在不要进步，就无法像老公一样领着大队。虽然，我真得很不爽被他从头到脚批评到很惨。但是，我的确错了，我应该进步。
老公一看到我的表情，就知道肯定发生了事情。但是，我没有时间和他沟通。经理不准我们一起回家，很想抱着老公。看着老公担心的眼神，一扫阴霾，再一次肯定了我的选择。
也许，就像老公说得那样，我们很早就开始了，只是我们都没有发觉。两颗紧紧相扣的心，无法分开，所以我们才会发展的很快。
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
前天，发生一件大事。当老公和我的同事一起走向巴士站时，突然一个巨型大轮胎从某一架罗里松脱掉了下来。那个轮胎从上面的公路掉至下面的公路，就差那么一步，我的同事差点变成肉饼。当时的老公站在后面，被这一幕吓倒了。还对我说，如果他们发生意外，他会一辈子心里不安。
当老公心有余悸告诉我们时，他真的很害怕。这时的我却是傻傻的，感叹着生命是如此渺小。老公突然拥着我说，他真的很怕。他更害怕当时的我在那里，如果是我遇到当时的情景，他一定会哭，还好我并没有在那里。看着他的眼眶含着眼泪对着我说出这番话，让我心疼不已。
生命就是如此，在你不知道时开始，也在你不知道时结束。我感谢着上帝因为此刻的我仍活着，庆幸着有着一位爱着我的人疼惜我。要知道到，世界如此宽阔，能遇到一个你爱的人和爱你的人并不容易，既然我已遇到了，说什么我都不会轻易放手。
谢谢老公，我爱你！
当老公心有余悸告诉我们时，他真的很害怕。这时的我却是傻傻的，感叹着生命是如此渺小。老公突然拥着我说，他真的很怕。他更害怕当时的我在那里，如果是我遇到当时的情景，他一定会哭，还好我并没有在那里。看着他的眼眶含着眼泪对着我说出这番话，让我心疼不已。
生命就是如此，在你不知道时开始，也在你不知道时结束。我感谢着上帝因为此刻的我仍活着，庆幸着有着一位爱着我的人疼惜我。要知道到，世界如此宽阔，能遇到一个你爱的人和爱你的人并不容易，既然我已遇到了，说什么我都不会轻易放手。
谢谢老公，我爱你！
Monday, October 1, 2007
我是一个大女人?
我是一个大女人？有时吧！在人前，我爱当大女人，在人后，我是小女人。就因如此老公中招了！
老公怎么说也是一个公司的领导人，而我却是不顾他的面子，狠狠在人前把他踩在脚下。要不是老公说出，我还真不知。下次，我一定会小心。
我的人缘顶好的，老公蛮吃醋的，看到我和别的男人太好，会心理不适。虽然心里甜滋滋，知道老公在乎我，但是，我是该对其他男子保持一定的距离。但是我最讨厌虚伪的人，虚情假意的关心，表面上对你好，气球被刺破了，还不是露出你最丑陋的一面。我会毫不留情撤下你的假面具，只因我向忠于自己，少一点麻烦。不想为不值得的人，浪费时间。
情侣最避忌的是吵架时，提起旧情人的名字。你气我就好，何必把另一人的名字提出来。杀伤力真大！老公还真把我气爆了，差点对他发飙。
我想我和老公蛮像的，知道另一方在生气，不管对方说什么气话，心里有气，都会等对方冷静下来，才向对方说。终于明白“忍一时，风平浪静。退一步，海阔天空。”的重要性。
过惯了二十四年单身的日子，现在开始不可以以自己为中心点，也要为我的老公着想。对不起，老公，这个星期让你受了这么多委屈。
老公怎么说也是一个公司的领导人，而我却是不顾他的面子，狠狠在人前把他踩在脚下。要不是老公说出，我还真不知。下次，我一定会小心。
我的人缘顶好的，老公蛮吃醋的，看到我和别的男人太好，会心理不适。虽然心里甜滋滋，知道老公在乎我，但是，我是该对其他男子保持一定的距离。但是我最讨厌虚伪的人，虚情假意的关心，表面上对你好，气球被刺破了，还不是露出你最丑陋的一面。我会毫不留情撤下你的假面具，只因我向忠于自己，少一点麻烦。不想为不值得的人，浪费时间。
情侣最避忌的是吵架时，提起旧情人的名字。你气我就好，何必把另一人的名字提出来。杀伤力真大！老公还真把我气爆了，差点对他发飙。
我想我和老公蛮像的，知道另一方在生气，不管对方说什么气话，心里有气，都会等对方冷静下来，才向对方说。终于明白“忍一时，风平浪静。退一步，海阔天空。”的重要性。
过惯了二十四年单身的日子，现在开始不可以以自己为中心点，也要为我的老公着想。对不起，老公，这个星期让你受了这么多委屈。
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