Recently, I have a new decision. I’m not going to step into any relationship anymore. So, I decided to adopt children. I know that I’m crazy. I lost all faith about guys.
When I told Ben, he was very angry. He said that I’m so into children project till became this way. Well, I asked him to become one of my share holder and help me to rise up the child. Ha.. I’m going to make another decision which will drive my family crazy.
The first thing was I became Christian even my parent were angry about this. The second thing was I choose the job which they were not agree and always asked me to quit the job. This time round, I not plan to married and adopt children. Can I just be a normal person? I guess that it’s hard to become mummy’s girl again. Maybe, I just want to do the thing that no one is doing. I’m weird. But, I happy that who I’m.
Who knows? I might pregnant and became single mother. Haha.. It is simply because I don’t trust guy anymore. A guy is just my tool to get what I’m wanted. So much possibility.. I never know that what will happen.. I just felt excited about my life!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Saturday, November 8, 2008
new
Big challenge is ahead! Taking UNICEF is a big step ahead for me and it’s going a big turning point for me! I’m going to move to next level. Yeah! Because of this, I have to exchange something which is important to me.
Yesterday night, Tim called me and scolded me. I’m very disappointed with whatever he was doing in the past. I realized that he is the one who always said I’m not good enough and how bad I’m. Well, it does make me felt that I’m going prove that he is wrong. I hate people who are look down on me. Tim, thanks you because you always look down on me and doubt my ability.
The person who always did opposite whatever Tim was doing is BEN. Sincerely, he is the one who always give me the support. Right now, his grandma is admitted to hospital. He is tired because he is the one who take care his grandma now. But, he did call me. He informed me that he don’t even have a time to contact with others. Truly in my heart, no one is more important than him.
When the time in need, i know who is the real one and who is the false to me. BEN, thanks for everything! I love u!
Yesterday night, Tim called me and scolded me. I’m very disappointed with whatever he was doing in the past. I realized that he is the one who always said I’m not good enough and how bad I’m. Well, it does make me felt that I’m going prove that he is wrong. I hate people who are look down on me. Tim, thanks you because you always look down on me and doubt my ability.
The person who always did opposite whatever Tim was doing is BEN. Sincerely, he is the one who always give me the support. Right now, his grandma is admitted to hospital. He is tired because he is the one who take care his grandma now. But, he did call me. He informed me that he don’t even have a time to contact with others. Truly in my heart, no one is more important than him.
When the time in need, i know who is the real one and who is the false to me. BEN, thanks for everything! I love u!
Friday, November 7, 2008
ben, i miss u
Just now, I send sms Ben through maxis broadband. I don’t know what happen on me. I was crying while I send sms to him. I so afraid I’ll lost him.
I don’t know what happen on me. I just keep on crying when I saw his sms. I miss him crazy.
I don’t know what happen on me. I just keep on crying when I saw his sms. I miss him crazy.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
team leader
Now, I’m on the way to qualify my team leadership. I can’t imagine lost attitude because of another thing.
I might take up UNICEF project, I want to faint already. It makes me found out that I’m so weak!
Jack was very angry because Chia showed my sms to him. When Jack told me about that I told myself that I not going to trust guy anymore. Chia, I ‘m very upset.
When Ben gave me the key chain which he brought back from Singapore to me, then I hug him straight away. What happen to me? I don’t know. I know that he is the only one I need. Ben, I miss u very much!
I might take up UNICEF project, I want to faint already. It makes me found out that I’m so weak!
Jack was very angry because Chia showed my sms to him. When Jack told me about that I told myself that I not going to trust guy anymore. Chia, I ‘m very upset.
When Ben gave me the key chain which he brought back from Singapore to me, then I hug him straight away. What happen to me? I don’t know. I know that he is the only one I need. Ben, I miss u very much!
Friday, October 31, 2008
Tim again...
Well, this is another Friday. It means that I have to meet Tim again. It is a very tough job.
While he is running leader’s meeting, I don’t even look at him. But, I still write down whatever he said because it was meaningful. I just thought that so many people and he will not notice me.
I felt that he is just another people in Cobra for me. It is better that we have a better business relationship. So, I talk to him like normal. He told me that I did not paid attention while he was running the meeting, and then I just showed him that I wrote down whatever he said. Phew.. haha.. you can’t catch me. When he was talking to me, I asked myself this question whether I have feeling to kiss this guy again. The answer is no and just think that he is Ben. I miss Ben.
After that, he calls me that he was having lunch with his fiancée. Well, my heart is pain. But, I still remain cool and inform him that just let me know when you are getting married. I don’t really know his intention. For me, I try to calm myself and told myself that I just normal person to him. Right now, I still felt very angry because Tim is the shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit person who can affect my feeling. %$%^%#*&$#$#@Q@#
If you asked me that who is more important to me, I think that I like Tim more than Ben.
I need Ben more than Tim. But, I lost both of them because they are not belong to me. I think that career is more important to me. Right now, I felt disappointed on Tim and Ben felt disappointed on me. It is stupid circle. It is ends now because I don’t want to make myself suffer again. Bye bye, stupid Tim!
While he is running leader’s meeting, I don’t even look at him. But, I still write down whatever he said because it was meaningful. I just thought that so many people and he will not notice me.
I felt that he is just another people in Cobra for me. It is better that we have a better business relationship. So, I talk to him like normal. He told me that I did not paid attention while he was running the meeting, and then I just showed him that I wrote down whatever he said. Phew.. haha.. you can’t catch me. When he was talking to me, I asked myself this question whether I have feeling to kiss this guy again. The answer is no and just think that he is Ben. I miss Ben.
After that, he calls me that he was having lunch with his fiancée. Well, my heart is pain. But, I still remain cool and inform him that just let me know when you are getting married. I don’t really know his intention. For me, I try to calm myself and told myself that I just normal person to him. Right now, I still felt very angry because Tim is the shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit person who can affect my feeling. %$%^%#*&$#$#@Q@#
If you asked me that who is more important to me, I think that I like Tim more than Ben.
I need Ben more than Tim. But, I lost both of them because they are not belong to me. I think that career is more important to me. Right now, I felt disappointed on Tim and Ben felt disappointed on me. It is stupid circle. It is ends now because I don’t want to make myself suffer again. Bye bye, stupid Tim!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
shit people = sk
Fail to be a good leader for the past few days. The shit thing happens again. I should not go to meet the people who are negative. Sorry, my beloved guys! Your leader is coming back on tomorrow. Yeah!
SK is the person who I need to keep distance. She is the one who ask me to quit the job and the same time asked me to pay for sing K. funny! Sorry, I don’t want to be like you who are money is not enough. Please be realistic, look at your situation and I think you better take care yourself more.
She even said how bad Ben was. Well, in this world I don’t think there will be a perfect person. I understand he is not a good guy but I don’t really care. I only know when I felt down and I need support he is there. While I was crying, he is there. He always understands me very well.
In my heart, I really need to thanks Chia! He always is there for me to help to solve my problem.
My conclusion is stay away from the person who thinks themselves very good. When they are know that they are failure and they will push someone down together. When I success, I’ll never forget how you look down on me. I hate the people who are enjoying watch other people’s fall. I never was going to meet her again. Really shit people!
SK is the person who I need to keep distance. She is the one who ask me to quit the job and the same time asked me to pay for sing K. funny! Sorry, I don’t want to be like you who are money is not enough. Please be realistic, look at your situation and I think you better take care yourself more.
She even said how bad Ben was. Well, in this world I don’t think there will be a perfect person. I understand he is not a good guy but I don’t really care. I only know when I felt down and I need support he is there. While I was crying, he is there. He always understands me very well.
In my heart, I really need to thanks Chia! He always is there for me to help to solve my problem.
My conclusion is stay away from the person who thinks themselves very good. When they are know that they are failure and they will push someone down together. When I success, I’ll never forget how you look down on me. I hate the people who are enjoying watch other people’s fall. I never was going to meet her again. Really shit people!
Saturday, October 25, 2008
y like that?
Well, it’s extremely bad day after meet Tim! I hope that I will not meet him again. But, it is impossible. Purposely act like don’t bother him but in the end I’m the one who sad. I think Ben detect my emotion faster than me.
I never know that he can create such huge impact on me. I found out that I not understand myself at all.
Sorry, Ben. I know that you are sad. Tim still very important to me.
I never know that he can create such huge impact on me. I found out that I not understand myself at all.
Sorry, Ben. I know that you are sad. Tim still very important to me.
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